Okay I can safely say that the last few weeks/months have been unlike anything I have ever experienced. Weeks of hearsay and rumors on which my as I know it hinged on. It has been humbling, hurtful, and above all hard. Somewhere mixed into all that was the reality that faith is hard, really hard. Trusting in promises you know to be true and a God you know can handle all things has been the biggest learning/stretching experience and blessing throughout these last few months. I have grown, I have cried, I have really searched out and solidified areas of my relationship with Christ. I may never know why I needed to go through these last months, but I pray that others saw Christ in me just as I saw Christ in everything.
All that to say, today I was told I got my job back. There, again, are no words – I am beyond excited and thrilled at the opportunity to once again love children through my teaching and utilize the gifting that God has given me.
Here is something you may not know about me….I love surprises!! Even more than being surprised I love surprising my friends. This I got to do earlier this month when Brooke and I flew out Wheaton, IL and surprised my dear friend Melissa in honor of her graduate school graduation. Along with Kim and Evan, who were known guests, we had a great time.
I ordered a coffee during a breakfast jaunt (a big grown-up move for me considering I don’t really drink coffee). We spent some time in the city (I love Chicago). I got a delicious heart shaped chocolate chip cookie at a local farmers market. We celebrated all of Melissa’s hard work and loved her with our presence as she deserved every moment. I love these girls and am thankful for this time in my life when I can go and celebrate large achievements and sisters of Christ.
Words are powerful things – they love, they encourage, they tell, they share, they empower, they inspire, they hurt. Today I received some written words that hurt, really hurt.
“I am sorry to inform you that your services will no longer be needed upon the conclusion of this current school year.” My final notice of termination. In other words, as it currently stands – I have no job. I wish I had the words to write right now that convey how exactly I feel but the truth is….I don’t. I am sad and yes, the situation is still not final seeing as the district could still call me and give me my job back – but the words I read today in that notice made it seem so final and real.
It is moments like this when faith is grown and felt in tangible ways. Don’t tell me all the cliches- I’ve heard them, I’ve said them, I know them – but now it’s time for me to trust those biblical promises that call me to rest in Christ, to cling to him as my provider and strength…right now I am struggling with that but I eagerly anticipate how those promises will be real to me in the not to distant future.
It’s also in moments like this, moments of deep grief where the Lord uses people to tangibly represent himself. Case in point, the AMAZING friends the Lord has given me who in the last forty eight hours have used words and in some cases no words to share love. I am humbled by them – you know who you are…thank you for being Christ when I am struggling to rest in him.
So here I go….on a journey of faith.
These are two beautiful amazing women who have been so influential in my life. If you had not guessed it they are my mother and my grandmother – I am truly blessed by them. I have spent the last few months observing and watching mothers both new mothers and old mothers and I am beginning to see – with wiser eyes – how hard being a mother is. This makes the “mothers” in my life so much more amazing – the fact that they have sacrificed so much and continue to do so, I know they spent hours on their knees praying for me, and despite all my anger or disinterest at times in my life they made me think and made me laugh. I cannot thank them enough for who they are and what they are in my life. So on this day of the mothers – thank you so much for everything…truly the Lord has blessed me by placing me with you. I love you!
Okay so it was yesterday…and NO I did not forget I got tired. But alas, I love you Brooke you know that…I am glad once again for the ways you have supported me, loved me, taught me, and so much more. Happy Birthday!
I am such a proud big little sister!!! My brother Sam just left for Southeast Asia with the CBU International Service Projects. I am so proud – I seriously am….I have seen in him such a growth and maturity in him this year as he as applied, trained, and now left with this team. Sam is a gentle understated leader and I have no doubt he will be a huge asset to this team as they go and play basketball and teach basketball to kids in Southeast Asia. I know it will be stretching and growing for such a quiet man – but please if you think of him…pray for him and his team as they serve for the next three weeks. I love you bro and am quite proud.
For all you faithful followers of my life….there is nothing new nor exciting going on in my life. Please stand by.
Thanks to my friend, Steve, in addition to being a teacher I now have the title Singer/Songwriter. You see my students are learning about plants. The great teaching standards of CA require that students in grade one must know the what plants need as well as the parts of a plant. So I decided they should learn it in the form of a song. (Good teachers know that putting things to a tune is a sure fire way to move that information into long term memory) Anyway I was not aware of a good needs of plant song so….I made one up. Now before you ask for the rights to this next chart topped understand that it has no real tune nor beat – but it has awesome motions and my kids get to jump up and down – so it is an instant success. Who said teaching was all about grading papers and boring drills…I am a singer/songwriter and I love it!
Here are the words to my new song entitled – The Needs of Plants
Plants need soil and water and sunlight and space
Plants need soil and water and sunlight and space
Plants need soil and water and sunlight and space
To grow, grow, grow, grow, grow
Yep its a musical poetic masterpiece – Stevie Wonder and Elton John are currently fighting to make it their next big hit but currently room 33 has the only rights to the song. Thanks for sharing in yet another reason I love my job.
So I am still in that unknown state of I might have a job next year or I might not. So if I don’t have a job in the realm of education it is highly unlikely that I will find one elsewhere thus, I have been thinking about other things I could/would do – it’s kind of a fun past time like I asking myself what I want to be when I grow up. Here’s potential jobs I have so far.
1. linguist – I only know English but I am willing to learn many more in order to accomplish this task
2. Graffiti artist – not the kind that illegally climbs freeway signs but the kind that paint legit murals on the side of buildings
3. Stuntman – enough said – specializing in BA car chases
4. Marine Biologist that swims with Shamu at Sea World- I have always wanted to do this – good things I am not afraid of heights
5. Disneyland fireworks designer -just as long as I don’t have to actually light the fireworks
6. Sports Illustrated Writer – this is legitimate hopeful possible job
I am still praying that the Lord would provide the funds necessary to allow me to keep my job – a job I love, but right now I am being realistic and looking into other things that would be fun to do for awhile.
Okay so I am like 3 weeks late. But Samuel turned 20 on March 22. I love this kid and am so proud of him and the last 20 years of his life. He is considerate, kind, loves Jesus, works hard, and is funny. Yes he is also annoying, beats me up, owes me about a million favors – but that’s all because he is my little brother. I cannot explain the overalls – I won’t even try but I did want to take a brief moment to wish him a happy birthday even if I am a few weeks late.
